I just want to get funky with a little litestep action....there needs to be a tutorial that's up to date and all inclusive.... too many wishwashy, vague, and alltogether unreadable tutorials for people who are on the fringe, or new.

hop on irc and learn direct...then write your own tutorial

There's no "recette de cuisine" for theming. Just download every modules, read every docs, test the modules you want to use (to see if they really do what they say; or in the way you understood it) and code, recycle, code again, recycle, recycle, recycle...
Have fun

Smurth is right, if you allow me to be a little bit obnoxious, "Even the longest trips begins by a single step".
ok sit down now.
I suggest you to read the module docs you have in litestep, and test what they say...
And then, like Smurth says, code, test recycle and so on, be curious
:)

first download some themes you really like or just find interesting (be sure they're OTS). then install them and start looking into the configuration files to find out how they exactly work. and i dunno, get inspired or sth :)