ok, ive been looking at themes for litestep at http://www.customize.org and none of them will install properly. they dont have a theme.rc file, they have some sort of .thm file. please help me, i have no idea how to install these.

.thm is a microsoft ext. for Microsoft Themes, formally .Theme. Why don't you try downloading a theme from here and trying it?

.thm could also be an LSTS file, which would indicate that the themes you're trying to install were made for OTSv1. Stick to OTSv2 themes for the time being, and/or check http://o-t-s.sourceforge.net/ for update instructions.